Butterflies and Heaven
by LLF
Summary: A moment in the ER with Abby and Luka, a patient...and memories.


_An article about children and their experiences in Heaven during traumatic medical events piqued my interest in doing a story about it. This is a Luby one shot. I hope you enjoy it._

Disclaimer: I own nothing about ER...but love the characters it has given us.

Abby arched her aching back as she waited with the newly minted intern, Clemmons, for the ambulance to pull into the bay area. She rested her hand carefully on her belly and watched as the doors swung open. The medics swung into action and the gurney was pulled out and hustled inside. A frantic mother followed close behind.

"Six year old found in a backyard pool. CPR restored her breathing but she arrested on site. No idea how long she was submerged. Name's Gracie."

"Damn," Abby shook her head as she used her stethescope to get a pulse while on the run with the gurney. They swung the bed into an exam room where Dori was waiting.

"What's happening? Is she okay? She wasn't breathing on her own for a while in the ambulance..." the little girl's mother cried. Abby looked up at her and smiled slightly.

'We're going to take care of her," she said. She shifted her eyes to Clemmons. "Let's get a cuff on her and we'll need an ABG, CBC and an electrolyte level." Clemmons nodded and snapped on a pair of gloves. She busied herself with a blood draw from inside of the tiny elbow and Abby checked the little girl's eyes for a reflex.

"Gracie..." she said. "Come on, kiddo...wake up for me."

"How long can she be like this" her mother asked worriedly. Abby cast her eyes to the mother's face and shrugged. Clemmons handed the blood vial to Dori who took them to be delivered to the lab.

"There's no way of knowing," she said quietly. "But keep talking to her. She might not be seeing you but she can hear you." Gracie's mother nodded as she leaned forward and whispered in her daughter's ear. She looked up suddenly.

"I need to call Gracie's dad," she said. "He needs to be here." Abby nodded.

"Dr. Clemmons," she said as she caressed the little girl's cheek. "Can you show her to the admit desk and have Frank set up the call? I'll stay here."

"Sure," Clemmons said. "Right this way." They left the exam room and Abby smiled slightly as she leaned closer to the little girl.

"Come on, Gracie," she said firmly. "Mommy is waiting to see you."

The little girl frowned suddenly and jerked as her body came awake. Abby gave a thumbs up sign when Dori entered the exam room.

"Hello there, " Abby said with a smile as Gracie's eyes opened. "Can you tell me your name, sweetie?" The little girl nodded and Abby pulled the oxygen mask off.

"Gracie..." the little girl murmured. "Where's my mommy?"

"She's been right here with you all the time," Abby assured her. She took the nasal prongs from Dori and adjusted them on the little girl. Abby patted her hand. "She'll be right back, I promise." Abby looked up at Dori and they smiled at one another.

"Looks good..." she mouthed. "Wanna get the nebulizer with albuterol set up?" Dori nodded and left the exam room. Luka came in and Abby handed him the little girl's chart.

"Sorry I couldn't take this one," he said. "Are you okay?" Abby nodded and rubbed the little girl's hand.

"She's doing just fine," Abby smiled at her and rubbed a finger on her cheek. "This is Gracie...and her Mom will be right back. She is calling her dad."

"Okay then. Let's wait for her mother and then get her up to PICU," Luka said as he signed her chart and set it on the end of the gurney. "They'll want to do a pulmonary series up there." Abby nodded and took a warm blanket from Haleh for Gracie.

"Jasna says that she's sad," the little girl sighed quietly as her eyes drifted closed again. Abby's eyes widened and Luka turned back with a slight frown on his face. How often did you hear **that** particular name in Chicago?

"What did you say?" she asked quietly as she tucked the blanket around the little girl.

"Jasna is sad because she wants to hold the baby," Gracie said, her eyes opening again. Abby glanced at Luka.

"Who is Jasna, sweetie?" she asked. "Someone from your school?" Gracie sighed.

"I saw her when I was in Heaven," she said. "She has long black hair. It's very pretty.'

"Is she a friend from school?" Abby asked again. Gracie shook her head.

"No..." she said. "I've never seen her before."

"I was playing with the butterflies and she came to me," Gracie said slowly. "She said she was sad because she wanted to hold the baby but her Mommy said that she shouldn't. She said that the baby was coming to make her Papi happy again." Gracie looked up at Luka.

"Are you Jasna's Papi?" she asked. "She said he was very tall." Luka was silent as he studied the little girl thoughtfully. Gracie sighed again.

"Jasna said that it's going to be scary ...but not to worry." Her fingers rubbed Abby's hand carefully.

"Gracie?" her mother hurried in the door. Gracie's eyes shifted and she held out her arms.

"Mommy!" she cried. Abby stepped back as Gracie's mother scooped the little girl into her arms and hugged her. Dori appeared at the door.

"PICU is ready for her, Abby. I can take her up right now." Abby nodded and unplugged the pulse ox cable. Gracie's mother mouthed the words 'thank you' as she settled the little girl back in the blankets on the gurney. Abby folded her arms across her chest and watched Dori push the bed toward the elevator doors.

"Well, that was weird," she said. "How often do you run across a little girl with that name?" Luka grinned slightly and shrugged. "I'm going to check the board and maybe grab a bowl of soup or something in the cafeteria. Care to join me?" He nodded.

"I'll be right there," he said. She smiled and squeezed his hand as she passed him in the door.

Luka's heart was racing and he swallowed as he thought about what had just taken place. 'Papi' had been Jasna's own nickname for him. Children in Croatia generally called their fathers 'Tata', but she never had. Danijela had been teased considerably about seeing too many foreign movies when she'd been pregnant with her. Luka had melted the first time his dark eyed, dark haired little beauty had called him that. The name had been their own special bond. And it was a secret he'd held in his heart since the day he'd lost her. There was no doubt in _his_ mind that Gracie had, indeed, been to Heaven and had an encounter with his lost little girl. Luka wanted to believe - did believe - that his family was together somewhere...and happy. Now he knew for sure.

But, what had the Gracie meant when she'd patted Abby's hand and said it would be 'scary'? Everything about this pregnancy had been scary for Abby. Was it meant to reassure her about normal, every day things? Or was there something more? Luka shook his head and tried to scatter the morose thoughts away. Of course not. They were together, weren't they? He was helping her and supporting her...loving her. He held her close every night and felt the baby rolling and turning under his hands. He would rub and caress it into calm, whispering to it in Croatian. Everything was just fine. There was nothing to worry about. He glanced about the exam room and then went in search of the woman who carried his child.


End file.
